Rating Curve

charmed life attempts to create a fun, uplifting adventure throughout the world, but is so utterly boring it entirely misses the mark. much of this is due to the song choice, which—while i think is fine on its own—simply isn't suited for a geometry dash level; compare charmed life's fairly monotonous and repetitive song to the incredible highs and lows of the music in dark travel and lonely travel, while being over twice as long. but even ignoring the song choice, this level features some truly baffling design decisions, such as the terribly boring gameplay, the lack of any real song representation besides some blending screen pulses, the last quarter being entirely copy and pasted from previous sections, and the generic settings which are explored about as in-depth as the worlds in new super mario bros wii.

beating this once in practice mode was more than enough for me,,,,i couldn't imagine how agonizing it must be to actually beat this level

people love to get wrapped up in the many numbers that surround levels. object count, length, number of hours spent—whenever one of these numbers is extraordinarily low or high, the wider community will lose their minds about how impressive it is, even if the level itself suffers as a result. personally i think levels should speak for themselves, and creators should just make these numbers whatever fits their level the best.

the biggest appeal of ivorystar waltz is its colossal sample count, sampling from 735 different levels, so it's ironic that this high sample count is also to its detriment. putting 735 different things in a level of this length is pushing it, let alone when they're disjointed samples sourced from all different kinds of levels that are held together by clear tape and purple glue. so many random samples were added for no other reason than to increase the arbitrary number of samples. as a result this level is messy and busy as hell, which doesn't at all work with the calming, serene vibe the level is going for. i do think sampling can be done to great effect in gd levels, but it's evident that this level uses sampling not as a means of artistic expression but as yet another number to flex.

i know we're all sick of hearing radio brought up when discussing sampling in gd, but it's worth noting how so much of the charm from it comes from being able to pick out the source of each sample. the more minimal decoration style gives each sample lots of breathing room, and made it so 7ak had to creatively work each sample together to create a cohesive final product that actually looks good; it feels like a celebration of all the creativity of the gd community. ivorystar waltz feels like its creator shoved all the community's creativity into a blender and didn't let off until it all became a textureless, gray mush.

edit: lowered my rating by a point after reading the ivorystar waltz document. it's so soul-suckingly corporate—not an ounce of joy or passion can be found within it. truly a miserable read

everything about final orbit feels completely backwards to me.

the level is trying to portray an astronaut reliving their memories as they die in space, something i imagine would feel very sad and lonely, and yet it's loud and bombastic.

the level tries to show the astronaut's memories, but it's just random scenery with a loose astronomy theme. did they not remember their loved ones or have any regrets?

the level places great emphasis on the background to tell its story, and yet the gameplay is so involved it's nearly impossible to focus on it while playing.

when you lay it out all like this, the rationale behind these decisions is plain to see: the level is loud and bombastic because that's what worked in the ncs gauntlet, the astronaut's memories are solely of beautiful scenery because it looks good in the background, and the gameplay actively works against the decoration because this level was intended to be watched, not played. these decisions were made because it's what wins contests. and while I guess I can't really blame bli for prostrating himself to appeal to the lowest common denominator when it'll net him more prize money, it is frustrating to see bli (and other creators like him) who can and have made great levels self-sabotaging their work like this. i'm still hopeful for bli's next level that isn't for a contest, but rage quit is extremely popular and I imagine final orbit will be too, so maybe levels like these will become the norm.

on another note, I really dislike the trend of over-optimization bli kickstarted with change of scene. the blurry, scaled up objects combined with the overabundance of radial blur makes for an incredibly nauseating experience, because there's no detail for the eye to focus on. it's not like bli didn't have enough objects to work with—he doesn't even use half of the allotted 100k objects. bli's older levels like absolute garbage look so crisp in comparison